The Gail Jilting Des Lennis

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Good grief, she loves playing the ruddy martyr does that one, never happier than when the pain and sorrow is etched upon her face for all to see.
She's only done that so she can continue to mither fake Gavin and Steph.
She'll be on their backs even more relentlessly now ...

"Oh I hate this secret that I made you keep ... you know the one that I specifically told you that Des could never find out about ... yeah that one ... I'll never forgive you two for keeping it from him ... even though it was my idea ... I can't live with your deceit ... that I made you do ... you two should hang your heads in shame for respecting my orders ... oh how could you? ... "

And so on, and so forth ... 

So, let's have a quick recap while we're here ...
A bag of chips will kill him, as we know only too well, so will a pint of mild apparently.
Ditto him finding out about the Gavins, or rather deffo!  Yes, almost certainly deffo.  I think the Gail might have mentioned it.
Hell, even the slightest, mildest of shocks like accidentally coughing behind him and making him jump could kill him.

Jilting the sap at the alter is absolutely fine though, not a shock at all that.

After all, who in their right mind goes to their wedding actually expecting to get married?


* A day inside the head of the Gail was brought to you by Uncle Q.

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She only jilted him, not because of the Gavin secret she has made herself and everyone else keep but because of that cringeworthy words from a corny 1940s song he quoted at her while blubbing like a baby.

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Yes, very true Lou.

It's almost like she thought ... "Hang on a minute, this one isn't a deranged madman, I'm gonna be bloody stuck with him."

Then she made like a door lock and bolted.

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Awww ... they're married now, the Gail changed her mind just in time for part two.

Was she just trying to kill him you think?

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Being jilted at the altar for the second time didn't kill him. Shame. Audrey must be seriously ill to miss Gail's wedding .Wild horses wouldn't keep her away.

Just one last question ................Where  was Lily, the disappearing baby ?

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Very good question Lou.
The writers have completely forgotten about Lily haven't they.
David doesn't even run up the stairs to tuck her in anymore.
Just like Gail's dad and Michelle's real son, she's disappeared into the ether.

She'll reappear I expect in seven years time, and the writers will skilfully and adeptly cover up their glaring mistake by brilliantly compiling a complicated back-story carefully explaining her absence ...

"She was upstairs listening to tapes in her bedroom."

So the shock of being jilted didn't kill Michael.
Nor did the shock of seeing his wedding buffet and cake destroyed by that irksome buffoon "Beffany."
Why even the shock of having no guests turn up for his reception couldn't off him.
Indeed they could have held that reception in a phone box.

The man's made of steel I tells yer.

The biggest shock is yet to come however ... brace yourself ...

That'll be the sight of the Gail topless on the beach in the Costa Brava.

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Why wasn't Michaels aunt Barbara at the weeding, much like our Aud, she wouldn't miss it for the world

[J-B]

The erm... missus... let out one hell of a fart earlier. Proper lethal it was. I've been desperately trying to get hold of Des ever since, I fear the shock of it might have already finished him off.